Girl Scout Grifters and other absurdities…..

Today is one of those loopy, snarky, l-o-s-t days for me.  Might be the weather, most certainly is the economy, might be that there are a million and one things I need to do and I’m not going to do them.  Because I am snarky today.  I have no reason to be, but I am because:

  • Months ago, a Girl Scout AND HER MOTHER came to my door.  They were armed with all the cookie sales gear:  official list of cookies, address list for deliveries, envelope for money.  Hadn’t bought GS cookies in years, thought I’d help out this young girl and place an order.   Upon delivery, I’d put them in the freezer or give them away.  No biggie.  Until I started reading about the cookie recalls.  What cookies?  Then I saw Girl Scouts selling their wares at the grocery store.  Hey, wait a minute, where are mine?  I was a Brownie troop leader back in the day.  WHERE ARE MY COOKIES?  Can you believe  there’s at least one mother/daughter team out there using the Girl Scouts as a cover to get money?  I only have one word for this couple:  karma.  Actually, double karma x 100 for Girl Scout Grifting.
  • Cooper the dog has a delicate stomach.  It gets the better of him about once a week.  In the middle of the night.  Loud enough to wake me from a sound sleep.  Eeewwww.  Do they make Tums for dogs?
  • Made a big mistake and baked two of three sourdough loaves in glass pans.  Too many bread crumbs to count.
  • The computer-generated calls for Michael Jackson have increased. My voicemail is full of them.  Janet, LaToya, somebody do something!
  • Spring break starts this weekend.  Miss Peach is headed to San Francisco, College Girl is off to Vegas.  I love for them to travel … and you can bet your boots they do!  I’m jealous of them.  My own children.  I am a lowly worm today.
  • I’ve been reading a book – a well-written true story – about the great friendship between two women.  It is a memoir.  One of them is dead and she was younger than me.  I am a hypochondriac …. a headache is a brain tumor, a side stitch a heart attack, blah-blah-blah.  Haven’t gotten to the part in the book where it says what the dead friend died of.  Think I better shelve that puppy because if her disease is revealed, I will catch it for sure.  Even if just for a few days.  Stop it!
  • Am up to HERE with unsolicited advice on what I should be doing and how I should be doing it.  It would be welcomed if accompanied by some help.  But that sort of advice never is, is it?  Curses!  Double curses as a number of aspects of my life are murky and unclear right now.  I’m not really whining, there’s really good stuff happening, too.  Must put “change perspective” on “to do” list. Tomorrow.
  • Fell asleep last night before Jeff Bridges won his Oscar.  Dude, am so happy for you!

Mea culpa. Am too icked out by my own snarkiness.  If this is all I have to bitch about, life is awesome.


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