At the risk of ending up the Mrs. of that wee smoking Chinese midget on the last “Amazing Race”, I’ll cast my fate to the wind and be straight up about the kind of man I am attracted to. My instant karma being what it is, Wee and I will be smoking God knows what in some Chinese province in no time. But just in case, here’s what works for me:
- Let’s get the physical out of the way first. Human. Tall (6’2″+) and reasonably fit. Arms and legs a plus, but not a deal breaker. Must have all original teeth in good working order.
- Must be employed. And a gentleman in every sense of the word.
- Thoughtful, kind, educated, and most of all, funny. Dry wit. Must think I’m funny and adorable in every way, even when I’m not which is about 90% of the time. In turn, I will be very sweet.
- Must be a man, not a boy. He can have some boy hall passes, of course, but continuous stunted growth behavior is NOT sexy, interesting, or acceptable. To me.
- Must have a life and, in turn, accept that I have one as well. This does not mean extracurricular running about with other women if you are the man. No suburban Jesse James-types allowed.
- Vulnerability and honesty are good, excellent communication skills are very good.
- Deal breakers: lying, cheating, cruel streak that rears its ugly head all too often, selfishness, delusional psychosis, alcoholism, drug problem, sex addiction, zero self-confidence, too much self-confidence, secret hatred of women. Con artists, grifters, and couch potatoes, make yourself scarce. And take the manipulators with you.
- No yelling or screaming. Library voice preferable.
I’d better stop. May be asking for too much, dreaming AND ranting. No mas. This is my list for today. As for tomorrow – who knows?
Just got pinged … it must be Wee.