Tight Screws, Cracked Codes, Man Cues, & Stupid News

Good grief! Current events and what passes for “news” are making my brain limp. Er, flatline.

 

 Just Precious

Forgive me for starting out on the hygiene aisle, but this situation is out of hand. A few weeks ago, I got a brightly colored box in the mail. I LOVE surprises. Or did until this one. It was from Kotex; a little gift box of green, yellow, pink, and blue feminine hygiene products. I don’t know about you, but my privacy is color-blind and this was the most stupid advertising I’d ever seen. Until yesterday. I was watching television and a commercial came on. “Mother Nature” and a perky young woman were having a Tampax tiff. Perky woman shut MN down when she proclaimed her “feminine hygiene” product was “cute”. These companies paid the big bucks for advertising. Note to both enterprises: Your Stupid is showing.

 

Teen Text Codes “cracked” on GMA

In an effort to inform and enlighten parents everywhere, “Good Morning America” did a segment explaining just what some cell texts hieroglyphics really mean. I’m sure I’m the worst parent ever, but I’ve never pried the cell phone from either daughter in order to read their texts. That would require surgery as the phones are permanently implanted atop their right hands and I have no interest in that sort of endeavor. Nevertheless, here’s what I learned:

  • cu46 = see you for sex (really?)
  • gnoc = get naked on camera (I think not)
  • 53x = sex (raging hormones, always a problem)
  • wtgfa% = want to go for a drink? (and the drinking age is?)
  • doc = drug of choice (the more things change … blah, blah

 

Wedlock/Deadlock

Writer Bernadette Anat did some asking around on behalf of Glamour and MSN.com regarding “What 12 Things Smart Women Know About Men“; I found two I thought were spot on and not absolute “duhs”. Those are”Be picky” and “Be friends”. On second thought, duh.

Staying on topic, I located a factoid at yahoo.com/answers; it seems the U.S. average age for couples to marry is 25 for women, 27 for men. I was 27 when I married the first time; the jury is still out whether I’ll attempt that again. Marriage, not 27. Then I read about this woman in Taipei. She’s hired a wedding planner and her big bash is set and ready to happen soon. She is marrying herself! The highlight of this rather sad tale was the brilliant anonymous comment that followed …“I give it three months”.

Morons with Money 

A human(?) recently paid $302,500 for a Barbie doll at a New York auction. You must be so proud of yourself. Really, throwing down serious change for a doll when people are starving in … America! Jackwagon. 

 

 

 Political correctness is slowly but surely imprisoning the American population. Those two words sound innocent and proper to me. They are anything but. Freedom doesn’t exist in a place where you must carefully edit your speech and actions, where you can be punished for your opinions. I get that extreme cases require extreme measures. When these measures also apply to Average Joe and Jane, you and me, resulting in loss (job, money, brain cells), then we have a BIG OLD PROBLEM. I’d find a way to fix this if I were smarter, but if you have a good idea, count me in.

Enough!

Later.

 

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38 thoughts on “Tight Screws, Cracked Codes, Man Cues, & Stupid News

  1. “I give it three months” — bwahaha!!

  2. Jackwagon!……Izzie….I get the feeling you must like that commercial where the counselor is screaming at the guy for living in “mamby-pamby land…” yadda yadda yadda and then proceeds to call him a Jackwagon! That cracks me up every time I see it. Now, if you have no clue what I am talking about….well then I just look like a complete idiot and I will go now…. 🙂

    • Yes, Idiot, I LOVE that man because he said, “Jackwagon”. It’s my new favorite word for … idiot. I know they got it from that Andy on Bravo – he calls everyone a Jackhole. Whatev.

  3. I showed those texting codes to my 16-year-old…she said she’d never heard of any of them! I told her to see that she didn’t!

    Wow 300 grand for a Barbie…does it have to have a head? I can probably dig up a few around here…

    Hugs,
    Wendy

  4. OMW, a current campaign for sanitary towels here in SA has everyone up in arms with it’s payoff line “Have a nice period”. How stupid is that?
    As for the texting … I have no words.

  5. “I give it 3 months” LOL!!!!

    Yesterday hubby and I had the exact same conversation about political correctness ~ it is suffocating us!

    And I would like to know what those numbers in front of a FB status is supposed to mean ie. (552) ???

    Have a great weekend!

    • Hey Jillsy! Am prehistoric re: FB – not interested so can’t decode but will ask daughters 1 & 2 and get back with you on that. Have a wonderful weekend, yourself!

    • Jillsy, it’s from a website Texts From Last Night, where people submit funny/embarrassing text message conversations between them and their friends (usually while drunk). The numbers represent the area code from which the texts were sent. When the website began it was hilarious but now people are just submitting anything they think is funny. Which always turns out not to be. But it’s become a “thing” to copy and paste ones you find funny or “so me” as your FB status. Hope this helps!

      Liz

  6. Man! I’ve missed out on a lot of sex and drinks.
    Gotta go reply to some texts now … .

  7. Great post, as always, iz. There are the most awful ads on UK tv for feminine hygiene products – do the ads really convince us which brand to buy?? I so don’t think so.
    Sunshine xx

  8. The “cute” feminine product commercial is the most disgusting thing ever. It’s bad enough when they demonstrate on a commercial (that always seems to air while I’m eating dinner) how super absorbent pads work, but to now call tampons cute? Just gross. I don’t care if I’m not 12 anymore; nothing about my period will EVER be cute. Bleh.

  9. Life was so much easier when I was a teen. I just used the one phone that we had, the one bolted to the kitchen wall with a 30′ cord, and then would just call up friends and ask them if they wanted to go out and get into trouble, or fool around, or try to get someone to buy us beer, etc. No codes….no texting….nothing….. SOOOOOOO much easier back then. Not to mention it was almost impossible for your parents to track you down if you did not call them from a pay phone or someones house…… Ahhhhh those were the good old days…… Now, we can get online and track every step our little fart has taken if he has the phone with him….. no place for him to hide……

  10. Tell me about it, Idiot. The worst thing about this “evolution” is no prank phone calls; a ridiculous activity I participated in on a regular basis from middle school through college. Is your refridgerater (sp) running?

  11. Agree about the free speech thing being a problem. Hard to solve as there are many goverances… Good luck in helping to solve it.

  12. So, if you marry yourself, do you expect your friends to give you presents? Because that would be seriously lame.

  13. ToddMan, I have no earthly idea about that as I am not interested in marrying myself. I’m not my type. hahahahaha!

  14. Those texting codes are much too true. I’ve gotten a fair mount of them. I also forgot to mention that I’m 31, and STILL getting them…

    xo-Abbie

    • Hey Abbie! Totally believe you still get them. I got one – no code – along the likes of ,”Dude, if you don’t get here soon, you’re not getting any.” Obviously the writer misfired. Ridic. x iz

  15. H-O-A-R-D-E-R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂

  16. Ok, ok I give. At least there’s a TV show ready and waiting for me. And when they get in my house and pull out stuff for three days, guess what they are going to find at the bottom of the pile? A bunch of smushed Idiots. Ha!

  17. Nice rant. I haven’t seen floral tampons and cannot fathom the purchase price of a used barbie. Geez

  18. I love this post! I especially agree with you on the last point of “political correctness”. We have gone way overboard and I have no idea how to bring it back to some normal level. Political correctness tends to be coined as being tolerant, but I feel like that could not be more far from the truth. The thing that is so amazing about the country is slowly being sucked from its original and organic birth and that is freedom speech and opinion. It seems the minority on subjects gets a pass to say and do anything than a majority. Case and point: 90% of Americans celebrate Christmas yet in schools and work place you can’t call it Christmas, it has to be the Holidays. Once while I was working for a company, which had a large Jewish staff, some of the support staff came to me and complained that she was asked to take down their small Christmas trees and garland that was in there work area, yet there was a Menorah in the entry way of her office area. I went and spoke to the department head and after an hour pow-wow I was able to convince that both could be present and neither should be offensive to anyone. The scary part was this woman was a much respected clinical psychologist. I get that she does not have the same beliefs of her Catholic staff members, but seriously, it is a 4 inch high Christmas tree and some garland on her cubical! I am all for cultural competence and I have Jewish friends that celebrate Hanukah, which I embrace and send their kids presents, even though I am not Jewish, yet they will not do that in regards to Christmas with my kids (not that it bothers me, just an observation) Why can’t society accept each other differences and celebrate each other. I think if we could let down boundaries on both sides we could understand each other more and political correctness would start to fade a bit more. Sorry for the long rant, you just hit the nail on the head of some of my thoughts!

    • Piece, I hear you! Excellent example! I heard on the news today that a woman in WhoKnowsWhere, America posted an ad in her church bulletin requesting a Christian roomie. She is being torn limb from limb for this by the press. We are living in George Orwell land and no one is calling BS on it. I thought I lived in America but as our freedom diminishes by the day, I am beginning to wonder ….

  19. That’s nothing Izzy, check out the Aussie commercial for Kotex….and yes that is a friggin BEAVER!!!

  20. we must watch the same program… I heard that right before I met my husband for lunch and then he and I discussed this whole topic. Is the host’s intials MK? It was Grand Rapids Michigan! The hubs and I think that the law was written so that housing authorites could not discriminate on a broader scale, but forgot to think about the small scale. I think many of the laws are written that way.

  21. OK IZ…….been a few days since ya blogged. Am I gonna have to get out the spiked ball and start breaking stuff in your HOARDER homestead to make u start blogging again???? Don’t make me come down there….or up there…or over there…..wherever the heck you live!! Start blogging….NOW!!!! and have a nice day! 🙂

  22. J’adore.

    I don’t despise the Kotex though– while the Happy Period is laughable, it’s meant to me, which is why it’s so damned funny. Then again, the more tired I get, the more smart ass and completely inappropriate I get– so it “works” for me. YMMV. 😀

    I could never marry myself either. While I AM fabulous, “We” (Me & Myself) are too much alike, and would probably kill each other. I already get on my own nerves enough sometimes.

    • Where in the hell have you been? I couldn’t marry myself, either – your reasons are, of course, better than mine, but I don’t have enough money to support Me & Myself. Have a happy period, pal!

  23. HAHAHAHA! I love the “I give it three months” comment. If I married myself, it would probably last about that long.

    I actually bought the brightly coloured tampons. I like bright colours. One of the boy cooks was rooting around in my purse for cigarettes and found one. He asked if it was candy. Uh…sure.

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