I’m Not Your Type; I’m Not Inflatable

Now that is a line I could have used in the past. Don’t need it anymore but you are welcome to use it when necessary.

Total silliness reigns here.  On purpose. Because it is fun to be silly and laugh a lot. I did both at a dinner party last night, and the person seated to my left said, “WHAT KIND OF DRUGS ARE YOU ON AND CAN I HAVE SOME?“. No drugs, no booze – just some levity when surrounding conversation topics were focused on divorce, dead people, and 401K’s . Which have apparently been downgraded to 201K’s. Let’s lighten up here, folks.  Moving on …

In an earlier post, I disclosed that all my trees have faces; Smiley McStump was featured. Here is my latest reveal:

Grumpy rabbit with weird nose hole and scary eye

Today is my “day off”; have been working up a storm. It doesn’t feel like work and that’s a good thing! So is cash.

fun-fun-fun
more fun

Other thoughts 

    • Poor Wayne Newton has had a bad lip plump
    • If I eat breakfast, I feel sick all day
Must dash, pleading contemporary insanity …
Later.

My Trees Have Faces and Other Stuff

No, I’m not writing from the psych ward. All my trees do have faces.

Smiley McStump

See? He’s the happiest of the lot. It is too early in the day to show you the others. September was  a month of observations – and not blogging. Climbing back on the wagon, I’ll share lessons some observations. Shocking, right?

  1. GMA  reported that men adore beautiful women – specifically women with big eyes, full lips, and a small chin. This info comes from a Harvard study. I get the eyes and lips but a small chin? Have you ever been complimented on your chin, period? Good grief, the only reason a woman even looks at her chin is to check for scary hairies.
  2. My neighbor. If you saw him on the street, you’d think he was a hunk of burning love. LOOKS ARE DECEIVING. He hates everything and everyone except dogs, me, and penis replacements. He’s just traded his ginormous Hummer for a Monster Truck. Said truck does not fit in garage. He is way scary … especially when he throws a ball or something – repeatedly – against my bedroom wall from what must be his bedroom. Ewwwwww!
  3. The two funniest shows on tv, in my opinion, are Saving Grace and New Girl. Zooey Dechanel is HILARIOUS!
  4. BARGAIN ALERT: If you have a CVS card, you can purchase a case of water for $1.11 this week.

If you want the secret to good hair – buy this:

Suave Dry Shampoo

You can find it at grocery and drug stores, it is usually under $2 and it IS a game changer in hair land. After having a pixie cut for 20 years, I decided to grow my hair out. Channeling a younger Anna Wintour, I am. While there is much more hair than I remember, it is straight as a board and needs a bit of volume. Enter Suave Dry Shampoo. You can use it however you wish. For some serious volume, here’s what you do: wash your hair, dry your hair, then spray the roots with the dry shampoo. Massage it in and wait about five minutes. Then fix your major hair bomb. Trust me on this one; I’ve had disbelieving friends test the method and they are converts.

Am big into bargain hunting  and latest finds came from Old Navy and Marshall’s.

Old Navy cardigan and turtleneck
Laundry tweed sheath/Marshall’s

The cardigan, under $20; the turtleneck, under$18. Lots of colors and variations on both.

The Laundry sheath (bad photo) is awesome and will work until spring. With opaque hose and great heels, not bad for $59.
Last but not least, if you want a really good laugh, check out http://whenparentstext.com/
Later.